SEASON OF WAITING
“Behold, I am the handmaid of the Lord. May it be done to me according to your word.” - Lk 1:38
One of my favorite stories of the Advent season is Gabriel’s visitation and announcement to Mary regarding the birth of Jesus. I have always loved to imagine myself in this scene and it generally brings me a lot of peace and joy. It reminds me of the humanity of Mother Mary. I have always been moved by how she at first questioned and was troubled by the news. I can definitely relate to this feeling and recall many times in my own life that God has asked me to do things that have taken me out of my own comfort zone and have redirected me away from my own desires onto a new path that I may have not had the clarity to see on my own without God’s nudges.
Earlier this year, I experienced an early pregnancy miscarriage. It was an immensely painful moment in my life that was both physically and emotionally difficult. That child’s due date would have been sometime this week but God had other plans for our first child and for us as parents. It was a moment of great grief and sadness for us and frankly, I don’t really remember how we got through it. I do remember that there were lots of moments of spontaneous prayer and asking for God’s help. I also asked a lot of questions during this time and was consistently reminded of the words from today’s Gospel: “Do not be afraid.”
God sent us little nudges in the form of our friendships that helped us realize that this would be a prolonged season of waiting and preparation for us. Soon we received news that I was once again pregnant and would be expecting a child whose due date is Easter. It recently dawned on me that God had been taking care of us this entire time and had been finding ways to break into our lives to remind us of his love for us. Looking back, it wouldn’t necessarily be the path that I chose for myself but it was a path that we had to travel to get to where we are today.
How am I being invited to say “yes” to God? What are some fears that might be stopping me from saying yes? In what small ways is God nudging you or breaking into your life?
Jeanalee Obergfell Villalobos