Our True Identity in the Lord
“This is the sixth month for her who was called barren; for nothing will be impossible for God.” Lk 1: 36-37
As an adoptive mother struggling through years of infertility, the word “barren” in passages like today’s gospel has been quite a stinger. Surely no friend, family member, or even doctor ever had the tactlessness to use such a word to describe me. Yet I’ve felt deeply troubled by the term, as if it has pressed upon an unseen wound. Though self-imposed, it has become part of my very identity.
What I have learned over the years though, is that this description of my identity does not come from the Lord. Following St. Ignatius’ teachings on desolation and consolation, it is clear to me that being described as “barren” offers no interior movement toward God or encouragement in virtue, but instead a feeling of hopelessness and despair. Further, it is not how the good Lord sees me, just as it wasn’t how He saw Elizabeth.
These days, my life is very much the opposite of barren. With my five-year-old’s laughter and toys filling my home, there is no possible way to describe my life as anything but abundant. And the Lord has always known this would be so, just as He knew Elizabeth’s future. Furthermore, the idea of being “barren” implies an emptiness beyond the ability to bear children, as if I am devoid of gifts and the potential to serve others. However, the Lord, with whom nothing is impossible, actively fills my heart with promptings toward neighborly generosity.
Prayerfully consider if an aspect of your self-image does not come from the Lord. Ask the Lord to illuminate how He lovingly sees you.
Patty Hussey