HEY, JUDE.
January 12, 2021, my heart was shattered into a million pieces. After over 12 years, I said goodbye to my best friend, my loyal companion, my greatest love, my dog, Gibson. For weeks after his passing, I sobbed, the tears and snot so thick, I could hardly breathe. The weeks turned to months and while the tears subsided, the physical pain and heartache persisted. The grief was numbing. I blamed the on-going pandemic, the obtrusive heat and smoke for my lack of interest in going anywhere, but the cloud of depression hovered.
Not only was I heartbroken, but I also felt a deep sense of shame in my sadness over my dog. People around the world were dying of COVID and I’m isolating myself, sobbing over an animal. I struggled to see where God was in my life – my prayer felt pitiful.
“The Lord is close to the brokenhearted.”
Jesus is closest to those that are hurting and suffering. In my heartache, Jesus was there. Jesus knew Gibson wasn’t just a dog, but he was the way in which I discovered the deep love of God. Gibson showed me unconditional love when I felt unworthy. He was a glimpse of heaven on earth.
“The Lord is close to the brokenhearted…” this phrase continues to speak to my heart, and I must keep coming back to that. To those that are heartbroken, the ones on the fringes of society, the marginalized and persecuted – Jesus is with them, and He asks me to be there too. Jesus is with me when I felt completely alone in my grief.
A year after I said the hardest goodbye, I said the most joyful hello to Jude, my fluffy chocolate brown, green eyed Aussiedoodle. “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted,” how very fitting and true. Jesus was and always is close.
Where was Jesus in a time where you felt brokenhearted? How is Jesus inviting you to sit with the brokenhearted? Where is He asking you to go? Has Jesus been able to turn something heartbreaking into something beautiful? Where is God challenging you to see how beautiful things can be made from our sorrow?
Listen to “Beautiful Things” by Gungor and reflect on how Jesus has been close to you in times of heartbreak.
Natalie Nathan