TRUSTING GOD
“Help me, who am alone and have no help but you, for I am taking my life in my hand.” - Est C:14
Jesus’ counsel in today’s Gospel reveals a God who promises to answer those who call out for help: “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you” (Mt 7:7). God is a generous giver indeed. But why do many of our prayers remain unanswered? When I struggle to believe in God’s goodness and love, my responses sound like these: “God does not care,” “God is too busy,’” or “God is not able.” When I trust God’s wisdom, my responses look like these: “What we ask for is not good for us.” “What we ask for is not good for us now.” “God is preparing something better.”
Then there’s the story of Esther. Esther was an orphan and underground Jew who eventually became the Queen of Persia. When the highest-ranking official of King Xerxes pushed a decree to exterminate all Jewish people in the Persian Empire, she fasted for three days and called on the Jewish community to do the same. She prayed with deep reliance as in today’s first reading. Then she approached the king using great foresight and maneuvering as well as her gifts of resourcefulness, diplomacy, and physical beauty. The king was persuaded and voided the decree. The fruits of Esther’s fasting, earnest prayer, and use of her gifts to the best of her ability helped many people. Her answered prayer involved a combination of God’s grace and human ingenuity.
I am reminded of an enigmatic saying by St. Ignatius of Loyola: “Pray as if everything depends on you. Work as if everything depends on God.” He adds elsewhere, “pray while you work and work while you pray.” While hard to live by, I find that trusting in God when praying or working brings me greater peace and freedom. Peace in realizing that the pressure is not on me. I don’t need to be self-reliant, for God is not only with me but laboring through me. Freedom to use the best of my abilities while being less attached to outcomes. Whether or however prayers are answered (or not), I tend to sleep better when I strive to trust and cooperate with God in prayer and through work.
Jesus, help me realize in whom I place greater trust, in myself or in you?